The downside of growing up in the rock generation was the lack of girls in your cultural orbit at a time when it's very important. This was especially the case between 13 and 18 when I met Dawn. While being in a tribe was great in many ways, it meant we were largely disregarded as a bit weird and nerdy, what with our obsession with records and trivia.
As I've previously written about, any girl in possession of a rock record found instant favour and a great deal of pathetic slobbering. If you wanted to be popular as a girl at school, just turn up with a Led Zeppelin album under your arm.
I recognised this early in my teens and that there was no point thinking a girl should appreciate Sabbath or Blue Cheer, you had to look to crossover bands that were likely to be appealing but weren't a betrayal of your rock identity and ones you could listen to in her front room while exploring your carnal desires. Frankly I would have listened to anything in order to explore my carnal desires, but then I was desperate
But to this end here's ten records that were acceptable to put on in the hope of some action that we didn't really understand but made us feel funny.
1. Eagles Greatest Hits Vol 1. Often disparaged by rock people but I loved them. Just enough gritty cynicism from Henley to season the soft rock and gorgeous harmonies. Great seduction record, if we had any idea what that meant.
2. ELO - Out Of The Blue. An acceptable form of progressive music, blended with just enough disco not to scare the horses.
3. The Sound Of Bread. Again, widely disparaged but I loved Bread. The melodies were lush. A good Best Of would set the tone nicely compared to Tarkus which would have sent her home early
4. Thin Lizzy - Jailbreak. This was a good record to put on for more robust girls who drank pints. Just enough romantic poetry and sexuality for a 16-year-old
5. Fairport Convention - Liege and Leaf. Made you seem a bit more sophisticated than the headbangers. It was history and a woman sang and who could resist that.
6. James Taylor - One Man And His Dog. Safe choice. His mellow voice and 'don't-disturb-the-parents' vibe made ideal for grappling on the sofa
7. Led Zep 4. For the more adventurous girls who would largely go out with you if you had hair like Planty. It only worked for older types who knew of the album's legendary status.
8. Earth Wind and Fire - I Am. You could move your hips to it at appropriate moments and they had fantastic songs. The jazz-funk-soul band that everyone liked.
9. Todd Rundgren - Hermit Of Mink Hollow. Great songs and sophisticated enough music to show you were a bit grown up and not just a sweaty teenager.
10. T. Rex - Electric Warrior. Every girl I ever knew liked the band and it was pop enough to show you were not a one trick pony. Just don't tell your Greenslade lovin' mates
